It is not your business to love me, it is mine. -Byron Katie

... One of Byron Katie’s teachings is that in order to stay stress free, we need to stay in our own business. She recognizes that there are only three types of businesses in this universe:

■Other's Business
■God’s Business
■My Business
Katie observes that most of the stress that we create in our mind is due to mentally doing other people’s business.

Example thoughts of being in "Other's business"

■You need to get a job
■I want you to be happy
■You should be on time
■You need to take better care of yourself
■John does not listen to me
■Julie did not smile at me
■My husband should love me more
■My children do not care for me enough
■My employer should appreciate me
■My mother should understand me
■People should be kinder to me

You will see that in all the above examples, the person thinking these thoughts is linking her well being to something someone else should do and should not do, which obviously is not in her control. It is thus the other person's business to do or not do what they need to do, not ours.




Example thoughts of being in “God’s business”
■I’m worried about the possible earthquake in california
■I fear that the river will get flooded next year
■I fear that that the world will end in 2012
■When will it rain this season?
■When will I die?

By Byron Katie's definition, anything that cannot be done by us or others is God’s business. You will see that the circumstances in the thoughts above are outside the control of human beings and is thus God's business.
             If we do not waste our energy in minding other people's business or God’s business, we can be much more focused on minding our own business, and thus be relatively stress free.
 
Examples of staying in “My business”

■Loving myself
■Taking care of my health
■Maintaining peace in my mind
■Doing what is right for my heart
■Giving my 100% in whatever I take up
■Taking full responsibility for my life without resorting to blame

Thus the next time we feel stress, the best thing to do is to take a look at whose business we are being in. Chances are that we are doing other's business or God's business.

We can then laugh at it, let go, and get back to our own business - which is really doing the right thing for ourselves, instead of dwelling on external circumstances that we have no control over and becoming miserable.

"Past is a good place to visit but certainly not a good place to stay."

The memories that we make in life with the people and the things that we adore in each moment are memories that we should cherish for the rest of our lives. Memories are made for us to be able to look back upon, and appreciate times that were good, when we are in periods of despair, and also to help us overcome situations tha...t arise in our present and future that we have answers to because of the things that we experienced in our pasts.

It is very crucial to remember when dealing with the past that though it may be a good place to visit, that it is not a good place to stay. Trying to live in the past will severely limit the future of any individual trying to do so. In trying to live in the past we essentially are focusing our efforts on going backwards in life, when we must only be concerned with moving forward, and creating the best future for ourselves as possible.

The Art of Public Speaking”--10 Simple tips :)

1 . Nervousness – Even the most experienced of speakers feel nervous before going on stage. So take it in a positive stride.

If you cannot handle the amount of nervousness, consult a good counsellor who will teach you instant anxiety relieving techniques.

2. Understand your material perfectly. You might not know every line by heart, but if you understand it 100% then you can mould any situation or question in your favour.

3. Create a friendly audience – Before starting your lecture/speech/presentation greet some of the people in the audience. Smile towards them. Relax yourself.

If you get time, interact with them before hand and talk on issues non-relevant to the current topic of discussion.

4. Before starting, Visualize yourself giving a very successful speech.

During Visualization Concentrate on how you deliver the speech, rather than the applause at the end.

5. Remember there always be a few people who will act funny during your speaking.

They might be making faces, or talking on the phone, or sleeping... If something bothers you, stop your speech for a moment, point out there mistakes and then continue.

This shows the confidence you have.

6. Attitude – Public speaking is all about attitude. If you want to succeed, your body will act accordingly.

If you think you will fail, you body will act accordingly. Think Big and Positive

7. The main focus should be on delivering the core message of your speech/presentation/ lecture.

8. Practice – If standing before 100 people is difficult for you. Then start by giving speeches in front of 10. Graduate slowly to 100. If you fail once, don’t worry, try again and again.

There is no harm in trying. And success only comes through trial and error.


9. Everyone has their unique style of public speaking. Don’t try to completely imitate someone else.

10. When you walk off the stage, no matter how good or bad you might have performed, don’t ever criticize yourself immediately.

Always and I mean always, the 1st thing to do as you get down from the stage, is to congratulate and applaud yourself for having stood up there.

Express your thoughts into actions ...Keep it simple :) :) :)

" Introversion brings out the positivity within ".

Every human being has an innate positive nature because of the inherent qualities of love, peace, happiness etc. that are within.

... Introversion, the practice of looking within, enables one to be in constant touch with oneself and one's true nature.

It helps express these qualities in everything that is done.

Because of having practiced for a long time with them, these qualities emerge very naturally at the time of need.

The practice of being introverted helps me in experiencing those qualities within me, which otherwise remain hidden during difficult situations.

Thus it makes me have true self-respect and enables me to finish my ego.

It also gives me the power to recognise and accept my mistakes, thus giving me the courage to work on them successfully.

Its all about your choice and focus...

A Pessimist sees the difficulty in every Opportunity;

An Optimist sees the opportunity in every Difficulty ..

One Opportunity leads directly to Another,

... Just as Risk leads to more Risk,

Life to more Life,

and our most significant opportunities will be found in times of

Greatest difficulty.

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15 GREAT THOUGHTS BY CHANAKYA

1) "Learn from the mistakes of others... you can't live long enough to make them all yourselves!!"

2)"A person should not be too honest. Straight trees are cut first and Honest people are thrown first."

...
3)"Even if a snake is not poisonous, it should pretend to be venomous."

4)"There is some self-interest behind every friendship. There is no friendship without self-interests. This is a bitter truth."

5)" Before you start some work, always ask yourself three questions - Why am I doing it, What the results might be and Will I be successful. Only when you think deeply and find satisfactory answers to these questions, go ahead."

6)"As soon as the fear approaches near, attack and destroy it."

7)"The world's biggest power is the youth and beauty of a woman."

8)"Once you start a working on something, don't be afraid of failure and don't abandon it. People who work sincerely are the happiest."

9)"The fragrance of flowers spreads only in the direction of the wind. But the goodness of a person spreads in all direction."

10)"God is not present in idols. Your feelings are your god. The soul is your temple."

11) "A man is great by deeds, not by birth."

12) "Never make friends with people who are above or below you in status. Such friendships will never give you any happiness."

13) "Treat your kid like a darling for the first five years. For the next five years, scold them. By the time they turn sixteen, treat them like a friend. Your grown up children are your best friends."

14) "Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person."

15) "Education is the Best Friend. An Educated Person is Respected Everywhere. Education beats the Beauty and the Youth."